Your Own Terms: A Woman’s Guide to Taking Charge of Any Negotiation

When it comes to negotiation, there is an ugly double standard. As women, if we make concessions to further a deal, we’re viewed as weak. But if we play hard-ball, we can be seen as overly aggressive – and the strategy backfires. No wonder most women hate negotiating. In Your Own Terms, negotiation expert Yasmin Davidds helps women strike a balance, merging our natural strengths (collaboration, relationship building, listening) with a firm grasp of established tactics. Guidelines, stories, and exercises illuminate the psychology of negotiation and reveal how women can: control how they are perceived; eliminate self-sabotaging beliefs and behaviors; discover their personal negotiation style; envision the ideal outcome and map backwards; build leverage; understand an opponent’s approach and adjust theirs in response; deploy persuasion and redirection tactics; and set the bar high and negotiate to get there. With this empowering book, women learn the skills to win on their own terms – and open doors they never knew were shut.

Table of Contents

Part 1: Own Your Game
Chapter 1: Empower Yourself
Chapter 2: Your Style: Changes You Need to Make When Negotiating with Men or Women
Chapter 3: How Not to Sabotage Your Negotiating Power
Chapter 4: The Four Stages of Negotiation
Chapter 5: Determine Which Negotiation Style Is Right for You
Chapter 6: Manage Negotiations with the “Backwards Mapping” Technique

Part 2: Build Leverage with Your Negotiation Toolbox
Chapter 7: Offensive Maneuvers and How to Counter Them
Chapter 8: Power Moves for Handling Difficult People
Chapter 9: Communication Strategies That Create a Level Playing Field
Chapter 10: Fail-Proof Persuasion Tactics
Chapter 11: The Art of the Redirect: Managing Destabilizing Moves

Part 3: Winning Game Plans: Negotiating with Power and Grace
Chapter 12: Gender Intelligence and Negotiation
Chapter 13: How, When, and Why to Make Concessions
Chapter 14: Negotiating with the “Big Boys”
Chapter 15: Negotiate Your Way to Leadership Success
Chapter 16: The Real Test: Your Salary Negotiation
Chapter 17: Put Your Negotiation Skills to Work
Chapter 18: View from the Trenches: Lessons for Women as Leaders and Negotiators

Appendix I—Language of Negotiation
Appendix II—Personal and Professional Checklist for Complex Negotiations